Big Time Love
by whencupcakesattack
Summary: Logan loves Kendall. He is certain Kendall is straight, so he doesn't know if he should tell him or not. KOGAN SLASH!
1. Chapter 1

**Hope you guys enjoy this little story. This will be 5 chapters if you think I should continue or not. Remember, this is my first fan-fiction so I might not be very good at all, so please I would appreciate some critical feedback on how to improve. THANKS! Also, this is all in Logan's POV**

* * *

><p>Chapter 1<p>

I looked across the room into the kitchen, watching the beautiful boy that stands before me, preparing some popcorn for our scary movie marathon that we have every Friday night. Kendall Knight, with his raggedy blonde hair and his piercing green eyes, had his back turned to me. Oh how I wanted to stroll over and wrap my arms around his waist and never let go, but I knew that was never going to happen, because of course, Kendall had to be straight. I, Logan Mitchell, had a huge crush on my best friend Kendall Knight.

I ran a hand through my short, dark hair with a sigh while Kendall slumped down onto the couch beside me, making some popcorn slip out of the giant bowl he was grasping. He positioned the popcorn bowl in the middle of us, making a big gap between us that can't be filled. "Great", I thought, "Now it will be nearly impossible to move closer to him".

"Hey, Logan, you feeling okay? You look a little pale." Kendall said, in his smooth, angelic voice.

"Yeah, just a little tired nothing to worry about." I replied.

"You sure you still want to watch the movie? It's fine if you go to bed." Kendall said.

"Trust me, I'm perfectly fine. Let's just start that movie!" I insisted, trying to sound as enthusiastic as possible.

He pressed play on the remote and leaned back. When he reaches into the bowl, his hand is only inches from mine. I want to reach in the bowl myself and touch his hand, calling it a mistake, but I knew he would just get awkward and not talk to me even more. More than halfway through the movie I could tell he starts to doze off to sleep. I stare at the clock. 1:30 AM. I guess I should get to bed. I slowly get up, trying not to disturb Kendall's peace and shut off the TV. When I turn back around, Kendall is just staring at me, those bright green eyes glowing even in the dark room. I blush, hoping the dimly lit room hid it. I looked away and walked over to him to grab the bowl not noticing he already had his hand there. My hand landed on top of his and the contact sent an electric shock through my body. I quickly pulled my hand away and started to walk away.

"I'm going to go to bed now." I said barely turning around. With that, I headed to the room that I share with Kendall. Once in the room, I made my way to my dresser and changed into my usual pajamas; a grey v-neck with my black cotton pants. I slipped into my bed and shut my eyes hard. A couple minutes later, I heard footsteps come into the room. I heard a loud thud, telling me that Kendall went straight to bed, not even bothering to get into pajamas. So many thoughts were going through my head at that time. When Kendall looked at me, did I see love in his eyes? No, I must have been tired and seeing things. Kendall is straight, why would he be falling for me?

* * *

><p><strong>Dawhhhh Logan is thinking that Kendall is crushing on him. Does he? Tell me what you think on this chapter!<strong> **Oh yeah and sorry this is pretty short, I was just testing this out. Hopefully my next fan-fiction will be a little longer... **


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay! Another chapter! And so soon too! Thank you for the little review btrlover21! You made me so anxious to get this other chapter up in the same day ahaha. Yes, this chapter is a little longer than the other (good thing right?). Also little disclaimer: I still don't own Big Time Rush... yet ;). Hope you enjoy! This one gets a little mushy, and Chapter 3 is probably my favorite, so keep your eyes peeled!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 2<p>

I woke up the next morning with the need to shower. I sat up and headed to the bathroom. I was about to open the door, when I heard the water start running. I stood there for a little bit waiting for something to happen; anything. I then heard his voice. Kendall's amazing voice singing one of our songs, but it wasn't just any song though. It was "Cover Girl", but when you listen closely, he changed up all the lyrics. He changed all the "girl" words to "boy" and I swore I heard my name a couple times. I just don't understand… he is straight! He can't be singing about me! He can't be falling for me. My head spinning with thoughts, I stumbled out of the room to see James and Carlos on the couch playing videogames. I plopped down next to them with a big sigh.

"You okay dude? You only sigh when you are bummed." James said, with a concerned look in his eyes.

"I'm fine, just thinking." I replied, putting a fake smile on my face.

"Sure, what are you thinking about? Or should I say, 'who?'" Carlos pried, trying to get an answer out of me.

"It's Kendall. He is making me crazy. I swear he was singing about me in the shower this morning" I said, finally giving in. James and Carlos were the only ones who knew about my crush on Kendall. I was writing down some notes in school, and I started to get distracted by drawing some things about Kendall. Luckily, he wasn't in that class, because before I knew it, Carlos snatched my notebook away and showed James all my drawings. That night I had to tell them about my crush. I made them swear not to tell anyone about me loving Kendall, especially him.

"Oh Logie", James said using my middle school nickname, "if you don't tell him soon, you will get eaten up."

"I know I just don't know how". I said desperately. I jumped when I heard the bedroom door open, and the walking angel strode over to the kitchen to get a glass of water. He looked over to me with a concerned face. He could tell that I wasn't feeling good again, and I couldn't just say I was tired like last night, he would never believe me. I blushed and found my crossed hands very interesting. He slowly made his way over to us. I noticed that ever since Kendall came out, James and Carlos were unusually quiet. Do they want me to tell Kendall now? No way, I can't. I'm not ready yet! Once Kendall sat down, I quickly moved closer to James. James gave me a nudge with his elbow and when I brought my attention to him, he was giving me a look that told me, "_TELL HIM NOW_" I ignored the look and turned to Kendall. He was staring at the TV, engaged in the battle James and Carlos were deep into. I couldn't take it anymore. I sprang off the couch and ran back into my room.

"What is wrong with Logan today?" Kendall said to Carlos

"I don't really know. Maybe you should check on him." Carlos said, smirking to James, thinking that getting Kendall and me alone would help. With that, Kendall got up off of the couch and slowly crept into our bedroom. I knew Kendall didn't love me. Why was I getting my hopes up? Kendall will never love me back and that is a fact. From those thoughts I started to break down in sobs. I hid my face deep into my pillow, and when I heard someone walk into the room, I personally was hoping it was James or Carlos. Kendall was the last person I wanted to see.

I felt the edge of my bed sag down, meaning someone sat down next to me. I continued to sob, trying to ignore the presence of another one around me. My breath suddenly hitched when I felt someone's hand rubbing my back. That electric shock told me that the one next to me was indeed Kendall. I slowly lifted my head and turned towards Kendall. I rubbed my bloodshot eyes and let my gaze lock in Kendall's emerald beauties. Without saying a word, Kendall pulled me into a huge, comforting hug. It was so good; it felt as though all my troubles melted away, with me along with them. I could stay there forever. It was about 5 minutes until Kendall let me go, and all the bad thoughts started to creep back into my head.

"Why were you crying, Logie?" Kendall said in the most compassionate voice ever. At that moment, tears started to fall from my eyes again. Kendall NEVER used my nickname because he always thought it was too childish. Only James or Carlos ever called me that. I literally froze in my place. At that scene, Kendall pulled me back into an even bigger hug. Once he heard I stopped crying, he let me go again.

"I'm s-sorry" I stuttered out, "I'm j-just letting m-my t-thoughts get t-to me a-again". Kendall looked at me again, as if he was trying to read my thoughts. I started to look away when he cupped his hand under my chin and pulled my face to make me look him in the eyes.

"Please tell me why you were crying, sweetie" Kendall said. Once again, I froze. Did Kendall just call me **sweetie**? This can't be happening. Our faces are just inches apart. He looks so adorable when he is concerned… especially for me. But I couldn't build up enough courage to kiss him. I don't want to ruin it for us.

"I can't get this person out of my mind. I know they will never love me back. They are so attractive and every girl in school loves him to death. Of course he is straight and will never love a guy like me. I feel so stupid for loving him, and I just can't stop." A stray tear rolls down my face when I finished. Kendall just stares at me. Then I just realized what I did. Kendall didn't know I was gay. He thought I was straight ever since I had my relationship with Camille. Oh no, what did I just do? I was waiting for Kendall to push me off his lap, give me a look of disgust, never talk to me, and run away and never look back, but the most surprising thing happened.

"Well one day, this boy better realize how great of a guy you are and falls for you too, even if he is straight. You can turn any boy gay" Kendall says, as I could feel my jaw drop. I couldn't believe it. Kendall just figured out I was gay, and acted like it was no big deal.

"Thank you" I said, hugging Kendall one more time, with lots of care. Man, do I love this boy.

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry if it was just a little confusing at first, but Logan explains his thoughts at the end, and if you didn't realize, the boy Logan is talking about is certainly Kendall. Didn't you really want Logan to kiss Kendall? I know I did ahahaha. Well ENJOY! Next chapter is really epic and some drama is coming up (in chapter 4). Keep reading and reviewing!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Woooo! Another chapter! I have to say, this one if my favorite out of all of them, and it's pretty long (not the longest). Oh and thank you for the nice reviews! I think this chapter has what everyone was waiting for... Disclaimer: The beauties are not mine... :(( boooo. Anyways, Enjoy, and don't forget to review please! Thanks!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 3<p>

I was sitting in my favorite spot next to the Palmwood's pool when Kendall came down. He sat down next to me in his seat. I was hoping that James or Carlos was going to come with him, but sadly they didn't. I really don't feel like being alone with Kendall after my scene last night. I focused my attention to my medical book as he pulled out a magazine. It was starting to feel awkward, and I really needed some answers from Kendall.

"Hey Kendall, um…. So about last night, are you ok with me being gay?" Logan asked looking Kendall dead in the eyes.

Kendall lowered his magazine and said, "Of course I'm ok! If it's boys you like, then it's fine with me. As long as you are happy, I am."

I couldn't believe what he was saying. He was being so supportive of me and I just love it! Maybe he was gay. He never really seemed interested in girls. Sure he dated Jo, but to me the whole time, he seemed like he was faking his happiness. I couldn't just ask him that though, it would make him figure out I loved him, easily. I leaned over to his chair and held his hand. He looked straight into my eyes. As much as I wanted to blush, I didn't and just said, "Why are you so kind to me?"

"Because I love you". Kendall replied. I almost fainted, right then and there. I jumped right out of my chair and pulled him with me. I lost my footing from my excitement and we both fell into the pool. When I surfaced, Kendall was laughing really hard. At first, I thought he meant this whole thing as a joke, so I felt hurt.

"Do you really love me?" I said very curiously.

Kendall pulled himself out of the pool and sat on the edge. I floated over to him and held out a hand. He took it and pulled me onto the edge with him. "Oh Logie, of course I love you. I have loved you ever since we became best friends. Seeing you cry so much earlier just broke my heart. I needed to tell you, I couldn't take it anymore."

Their faces were only a couple inches apart. I couldn't take it anymore. Kendall loves me, and I love him too. I pushed our lips together, closing the gap between us. I put my arms around his neck and he snuggled me impossibly closer to him, not breaking the kiss. The electricity being passed between us was so powerful and amazing. We totally forgot about breathing, so I broke away to catch my breath. When I looked around, everyone was looking at us. James, out of now where, ran up to us and nearly yelled, "Well it's about time isn't it, huh?" I playfully shoved James and Kendall winked at him.

"Maybe we should go back to the apartment" Kendall suggested. I nodded and he took my hand in his. He led me to the elevator because I couldn't feel my legs anymore. I felt like I was on Cloud 9. All I've ever wanted just came true. He finally loves me. This is just perfect.

That night, we did some remodeling to our bedroom. I helped Kendall slide both our beds together so it would be easier to sleep together. Once we finished, I grabbed my pajamas. Kendall was on the bed, watching me. I was going to go into the bathroom, but Kendall stopped me. It was okay with me, but I just didn't want it being awkward. I removed my t-shirt and took off my blue jeans, making sure to keep my boxers on. I threw the dirty clothes into the hamper and pulled on my black plants. I sat down on the bed next to Kendall and looked at him. Before he got up to change, he planted a kiss on my forehead and ruffled my hair, making me blush. He peeled off his plaid shirt and jeans, leaving his boxers on also. I stared at his perfect body; his defined abs, his muscular arms, his perfect legs, and of course that beautiful face of his. He pulled on plaid pants and grabbed my hand. I got off the bed and he hugged me. I kissed his cheek and we made our way to the living room.

James was sitting on the couch with Carlos, his hands entangled in his hair. Carlos was leaning on James. I couldn't help but smile. I looked at Kendall, who also had a big grin on his face. Carlos saw me, and then looked at Kendall, then back at me. "So… are you two… together?" I looked at Kendall and he nodded

"Yes Carlos, we are completely together, and we love it" Kendall said, while giving me a kiss on the lips.

James leaned down and gave Carlos a kiss on the nose. "You are so cute when you are falling asleep", James told Carlos, making Carlos blush.

"You two should go to bed" I told them. James gave Carlos a nudge and they both got up a made their way to their shared room. I turned to Kendall and gestured to the couch. We both lied down, snuggling up to Kendall's side. We watched a movie together until we fell asleep.

* * *

><p><strong>EEEPPP! KENDALL LOVES HIM BACKKKKK! AHHH! I hope you liked the little piece of Jarlos in this chapter too! SPOILER ALERT FOR NEXT CHAPTER: BIGGG drama, including a guest star of Jo (after reading chapter 4, you will hate every one of her guts, I know I do). ALSO chapter 4 and 5 are REALLY short. Just a heads up. Sorryyyy I wrote this whole story at like 12 AM and it took like 4 hours to write so... I made it short. Next fan-fic will be longer. <strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Finally, I made another chapter ahah. Sorry, I have been really busy and stuff so I couldn't upload... oh and just a little warning... there is major drama in this one, and also it is like one of the shortest chapter. Spoiler alert: Jo comes in on this chapter. Lot's and lot's of drama and angst between Logan and Kendall. Disclaimer: none of this stuff is mine... sadly. ENJOY!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 4<p>

I woke up that morning to the familiar sound of Kendall's phone ringing. I looked around and saw we were both in bed, but I thought we were on the couch. I didn't let the thought bug me, and I looked around for Kendall. I couldn't find him. I took his phone and read the caller ID; Jo Taylor. Weird, Jo hasn't talked to Kendall ever since she was caught cheating on him with Jett. I took the chance and hesitantly pressed the button and put the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I said carefully

"KENDALL HOW DARE YOU! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" Jo screamed

"Umm… this isn't -" I tried saying, but Jo cut me off.

"KENDALL I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU DATED ME EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE GAY! YOU TOTALLY USED ME JUST TO COVER UP YOUR DIRTY LITTLE SECRET! I FEEL SO HORRIBLE! YOU LITTLE JERK! I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY! YOU BETTER BE HAPPY WITH THAT LITTLE GEEK FREAK LOGAN. AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU NEVER TOLD ME." Jo started to cry, "I'm sorry for freaking out. I just don't understand why you had to lie to me and tell me you were straight. I guess I'm just jealous you found someone better than me. I just want you back. That Logan kid doesn't deserve someone like you. I do. Logan is too ugly and freaky for you. He is too much of a geek. He will just ruin your reputation. I can't even imagine you dating him after what you said about him. I totally agree with you though, he IS immature. He blushes at everything and overreacts to most things. He is way too annoying and ugly. Oh yeah and he is so short, it's weird to match you with him. Listen, I just want you back. I know you don't really love that kid and you still love me. Just think about it." With that, Jo hung up the phone.

I threw the phone across the room and curled my legs up to my chest. I couldn't stop the tears from falling. The tears kept falling harder and harder. My little cries turned to bigger sobs. Kendall finally came into the room with only a towel around his waist and his hair freshly washed. He had a stack of magazines in his arms, but when he saw me, he dropped everything and ran over to me. He sat down and pulled me right into his lap. I refused to look into his eyes. He started pulling my head over to direct my look into his eyes, but I shut my eyes as hard as possible. He kissed my lips, but I pulled away. I opened my eyes only a little bit; too see the hurt on his face. "Jo called" I said simply.

* * *

><p><strong>Oh boy... what will happen between Kendall and Logan? Stay tuned ;)<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 - the final chapter. This is the very last chapter to my first fanfic! Hopefully you guys enjoyed, and yeah! Thanks for all the reviews and hopefully you find this chapter a little bit better than the last chapter. Disclaimer: I don't own these amazing souls of men... :(( soo sadd. Anyways, enjoy!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 5<p>

He wiped the tears off my face and said, "Anything Jo said, was completely not true, yes she might have yelled at me, which I guess I deserved for not telling her I was gay, but if she said anything to hurt you, it was not true. Do not listen to anything she said about you or any words she put in my mouth. I would never say anything bad about you, I love you."

"She said you didn't love me, and you still loved her. She said you didn't deserve a geeky freak like me and that I was too short and ugly for you." I replied.

"Oh, Logiebear, you know that is not true. I was bi when I was little and gay ever since we met, I never had feelings for Jo. I guess I did use her so my cover wasn't blown, but still I never loved her. I never told her that I loved her. She told me all the time, but I never said it back. Anyways, you are the most handsome being I have ever seen and you are not too short for me. You are the perfect height and I love it. Also, you are not a geeky freak. You are a little nerdy, but in the most adorable way possible." Kendall reassured me.

"I believe you Kendall" I said, with relief. I'm just glad that my Kendall really loves me back.

It was a month later, and we were celebrating our 1 month anniversary. "I am taking you to your favorite restaurant Logiebear!" Kendall said with great amusement. "Get ready to leave in half an hour".

"Okay Kendall!" I said. I changed into a better outfit; a blue button down shirt and black skinny jeans. Kendall walked into the room once I took off my tee-shirt and he wrapped his arms around my waist.

"Hey beautiful." Kendall chimed into my ear before kissing it.

"Are you going to let me put on my shirt?" I asked

"No, your body is too amazing." Kendall said, making me blush madly. I quickly spun around to face Kendall and kissed him on the lips. I felt him kiss back, and ran his tongue along the bottom of my lip, asking for entrance. I allowed him and we were shortly battling for dominance before Kendall easily won. We had to break away for air, and he slowly made his way down my neck pecking each trace of skin with little kisses. I took him into a huge hug. When we let go of each other, I threw on a white tank top and then my button down. Kendall was already dressed and ready to go when I finished. We got in his car and drove off to the restaurant. Once we got seated there, we sat as close to each other as possible.

"Am I your first boyfriend?" I asked Kendall, curiously, after we ordered.

"Actually, no" Kendall replied. I needed to know more about this.

"Tell me all about him please." I persisted.

Kendall laughed and said, "Well, his name was Jack. We first met when I was 13 and then he started getting 'closer' to me. When I say that, I mean he started hitting on me and made a lot of moves on me. It took me a while to start falling for him. He looked a little like you, but you are 10 times more attractive" This made me blush really hard, "he first kissed me on my 14th birthday. It honestly surprised me, because I thought he liked my other friend, Tom. We started dating after that, but then I caught him cheating on me with… believe it or not… Tom. I knew he had the hots for that guy." Kendall continued.

I couldn't believe it. He went through a lot. It must have been harder on him because he was only 14. My first relationship was really Camille. Kendall is my first boyfriend and I love him so much more than I even thought I liked Camille. "Wow, I'm so sorry" I tried to sound as comforting as possible, without going overboard in public.

"It's okay sweetie. I have you now, and I know nothing will tear us apart."

* * *

><p><strong>Well that's it for this story! Sorry if the ending is a little... eh... but I still hope you liked it! I really enjoyed writing this, and I hope to write more in the future (not that far in the future). <strong>


End file.
